My heart was truly saddened over the weekend after hearing about the recent suicides of Gay Maryland Mayor Kevin Ward and Former Miss America Chelsie Kryst. What saddened me even more was the response of the public to the disheartening news. 

Some responses indicated surprise based on the individual's look, financial status, or position in life. Truth is mental health doesn't discriminate...people do. 

Unfortunately we as people determine who has mental health issues. I hope these unfortunate deaths remind us that those who exhibit strength, beauty, financial prosperity, also may be struggling with mental health issues and suicidality. 

Action Item: Check on your friends whether you regard them to be strong or not...Ask them how they feel and challenge them to explain those feeling. It may make a difference...

Just something to this about....

I have dogs…I mean fur babies….I have two fur babies who I love very very much. Although they can work my nerves at time, especially this morning. So I wake up really early….Like before 4:00AM early….Like are you crazy early!!! I make sure I wake up in enough time to do my morning self care and what not. Make sure I am staring my day on the best foot that I can. No one want to be around the Jourdan who has not done his morning stuff, I promise you. Anyway…. It’s early, Im groggy and I barely know where the (Bleep) I am and here come Bella and Channing. They are excited!!!! Panting, clacking on the floors, jumping around and frolicking as if it’s 9:00AM and they are heading to brunch. That immediately pisses me off. How dare they wake up happier than I am. So I try to make them go back to bed, which their reply to that is a resounding no as they run towards the stairs. In my mind the endless task of the day start flooding my psyche and Im like “Here we go.” I lethargically head down stairs and immediately proceed to finds other things that will piss me off. Why is the sofa like this, who left this here, and where the (Bleep) is my candle lighter. Meanwhile Bella and Channing still celebrating life because it must be someone’s birthday or something. I haed to the door, check for safety and let them out. Do you know they have the nerve to just be out there taking their time. No worries in the world…Just chilling and wasting my morning time. I do everything I can to get them to hurry up….I give looks, I use my stern voice, I even walk over there to make sure they see me and Nope…they are not going. We get in…they dash back upstairs and leave me with my feelings. Ain’t that something. Now Im over here tripping and they are on to the next happy moment. I took a moment to think about what I needed to shift my mind set a little or at least get ahold to a better morning. Beyonce helped a little, coffee helped a little and journaling helped a bit too. The meditation that morning finished me off and ensured I was looking at things from a better view.

Its funny how something so small can skew the way you see things. It’s funny how someone or something can trigger emotions and reactions that cause you to go into a hole of negative thoughts and feelings. What’s not so funny is dealing with all of the stuff people leave behind once the damage is done. ( whether they know it or not.) It was my job to ground myself, figure out my stuff and decide what I needed in the moment to make myself feel better. Figure out what I needed to be happy and unconcerned like Channing and Bella. Long story short…..don’t be like me….Be like Channing and Bella. And if you can’t be like them then do the work to figure out what makes you feel better and which view suits you the best.

Who's making your decisions? Are you truly choosing what you want and who you want to be? 

Ive been muddling over a few things this week because I have been wanting to make the decision that makes others the happiest. Not really considering myself...I have been attempting to keep the peace, be strong, take care of the team.

But after some thought....or more like no thought (meditation) , I finally reached my (bleep) it moment. That moment happens when you have decided that Ive thought about this enough, or done this enough and its time time to focus on me or what's more important. 

Truth be told...I believe a lot of us make decisions based less on how we feel and more on how others feel. I want to encourage us all to shift that a bit...little by little. Because one thing that I know for sure for sure is that no one is paying our bills. No one else is being held responsible or accountable for our feelings but us. And no one is dealing with the emotional baggage of the neglect we've piled upon ourselves but us. 

Action Item: Take one thing you've been trying to decide on. Think about what would make you the happiest without any one else 's input or feelings involved. Just make this decision for you....(this may not be easy...and that's ok) Ask yourself what feels the best or ok for now....and decide. You got this!!!!

Just something to think about.... 

Life is ever changing....evolving...shifting...so much so that at times its hard to catch up. It's hard to process one thing before something else has occurred. Like my grandmother would say, "It's always something." 

This is a reminder that through the changes, through the difficult winds of life to take it easy on yourself. What does that mean? Im glad you asked...

It means giving yourself grace to rest. Allowing yourself to feel this vulnerable feelings. Just as the universe, Sun, moon and stars all have a specific timing and rhythm so do you as a evolving individual. in some phases of growth you push and in others you sit, rest and reflect.

While your resting try to judge yourself as little as possible...or if you can't help but judge yourself loosen your criteria a bit. Do more self care, watch more things you enjoy, spend time pouring into yourself through whatever means is available. 

Whatever you do...please...take it easy on yourself....be nice to my friend...

Lately the concept of fear has been greeting me at my door. And every day I have said hello and walked right past it lol ( I don't have time for fear).

Well this morning I am making a little time to do some fear setting. Fear setting is similar to goal setting but it's approached from the things that you fear the most. After working through the things you fear the most you develop concrete steps to help you mitigate and decrease the fear you feel. 

The work can be hard but I think its worth it. When you truly think about some of the things we fear...is that fear worth less of a life. Is that fear worth a new career you love, new family, new experiences that make your soul shine. I no longer think so...

So cheers to our friend fear...who makes us rethink Lions, Tigers and Bears. But more importantly love, light, acceptance and kindness to fear which has protected us and caused us to think more clearly about the exciting things we want to do with our life. 

Action Item; Do It Scared!! Do it With Fear...and plan what you can...the rest we will figure it out...

Something to think about.....

There are a lot of things to do. There are a lot of people to see. There is just a lot of things in general. On a daily bases we are overtaken by the sheer amount of things we have to do to ensure the train keeps running. Or if you are a Greys Anatomy fan...keep the carousel turning. 

So as the person in your corner rooting you on...all I ask is that you do one thing. One thing that makes you come alive. One thing that reminds you that life is worth living. One thing that allows you a moment of flow. One thing that gives you a sigh of relief. The rest can wait...But you can't. 

Action Item. Figure out what that one thing is that makes your day feel just a little better. After that, take that thing and schedule it everyday... 

Just something to think about....